NOTE: This post will evolve as we receive your stories and photos from the event. Please SEND ME THINGS LIKE YOUR COOL PHOTOS and I’ll try to incorporate some of them on the site. I can’t stress this enough… your participation in the blog - your comments, stories, ideas and images - is what we need for takeoff. We’ll fly higher than an eagle, if you’ll be the wind beneath our wings.

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In Dumb and Dumber the lovable loser Lloyd Christmas famously asked, “Hey, wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?” I think most moviegoers would pretty much agree that it was, in fact, the most annoying sound in the world and that he should please, please, pretty please STOP doing that immediately. But last night’s Pirate Prom might have set a new gold standard with the cacophonous chorus of three hundred revelers ARRRRRRRRRRRING themselves through the night. And leading the charrrrrrrrrrrrge was our very own Desiree. (FYI, she is very single and begging me to pimp her out on the blog. We’re accepting applications from both guys and gals).

And while I am postively repulsed and allergic to a whole slew of sounds - like that of the pug snoring right now on my right foot - few things wear on me like advanced exposure to Pirate Talk. (This says alot since I grew up in New Joise where people tawked like this). ARRRRRRR!!! just ain’t my thing. And nothing shivers me timbers more than a glass of charrrrrrrrrrrrrdonay. In fact, as far as I’m concerned the only time this pirate talk is anything other than irritating is when my kinda-sorta-stepson Justice tells his new joke: “Have you heard about the new pirate movie? It’s rated arrrrrrrrrr.” That’s cute. But he’s three. So unless you are Captain Jack Sparrow, my vote lies with David W. Boyles and his annual International NEVER Talk Like a Pirate Day!.

BUT, I must admit that there was a bright and shiny and secret treasure in every last Arrrrrrr last night. It was, after all, the sound of hundreds of plumed and costumed women and men unleashing their inner girls and boys… the echo of a cultish winery “Fighting for Fun in a Winey World.” And of course, it was good fun in the name of a really good cause - helping the folks at 826 Valencia teach kids to write more gooder.

Our condolences to the neighbors though, who called us for two and a half hours until just after 1 a.m. when we finally pulled the plug. I guess there’s something about the combination of Mackie Subwoofers and DJs Zack Darling and Malarkey that doesn’t add up to sleep.

And this is to say nothing of the people howling in love and lust at the spontaneous appearance of sexy fire dancers…

So, again, sorry neighbors! Our Tasting Room manager, Steve, will stop by in a few days with apologies and wine. But don’t worry, he cleans up well. He doesn’t always look like a bloodthirsty raptor.

And sorry to people like Stan who might have been offended by the porn I projected onto an opposite building. How could I resist a pirate porn flick with the industry’s all-time biggest budget? (Unfortunately, Blockbuster only had the R-rated cut but still, it provided an occassional eyeful).

The Pirate Prom was just one of those experiences where anything could happen. And some strange things did. Like at the end of the night when someone decided to stage his own little Burning Man and TORCHED OUR FUCKING PIRATE.

Thanks Larry Lighter. You saved us from having to pack up (the brand new prop Naomi and I scored last week in NYC) and store it for the next party. Luckily now all I have to do is sweep the ashes into the waterwall. You’re the best.

Oh, and I’d also like to give a BIG shout out to the two drunk guys who I caught striking the outdoor lights and roshambo sign with what looked like nine irons. You were totally awesome. Laughing and loud and maniacal like I imagine the Duke Lacrosse team to be. Woohoo! Two points for you! Can’t wait to have you back again.

Ya see? All sorts of good fun! Now, if you didn’t make it and are now left feeling weak, peaked, and robbed, like you missed out on the wildest party bubbling up from wine country, well that’s because you did in fact drop the ball. BIG TIME. You can’t say we didn’t try to warn you. Hell, Stephen Colbert even put you On Notice.